You may have heard about the Big 3 on the east coast, but have you heard about the Big Me on the west coast? The Big Me sports a 6-6 220lb frame, and is the most deadly offensive weapon since MJ. The Big Me is a 3 time NBA Champion, 2 time Scoring Champion, 9 time NBA All-Star (twice as the MVP), and one time member of the “denied access to the back door” all American team (which has been captained by former Sliders star Jerry O’Connell the last 12 years.) The Big Me is none other than Kobe Bryant.
The Lakers star has been on a constant Merry-Go-Round ride as to whether or not he wanted to be traded. It’s now believed that he does indeed want to be traded, but because of his large salary and immense talent it’s almost impossible to do so without completely destroying the Lakers or placing Kobe in a worse situation than he is currently in. Quite the conundrum eh? Well it gets worse for the Big Me. It seems he has varying degrees of selfishness. It’s actually really hard to separate one selfish act from another. He can’t coexist with Shaq…Shaq leaves…he can’t win anymore he blames his team…he gets tired of blaming the team, so he blames the owner. This type of behavior wouldn’t be tolerated in any work environment in the world. The Big Me is also too selfish for his own good. What many experts around the league are calling his refusal to be anything but a top competitor is nothing but his self-interests rising to the surface. He could cry and bench himself to force a trade, but Kobe is so engrossed in his own personal statistics he insists on crying and posting 45 point nights up. This means the Lakers keep him around as an unhappy superstar as opposed to an unhappy salary albatross.
Now how can I know its self satisfaction as opposed to competitive nature like the experts suggest? It’s all in his demeanor on the court and his attitude off the court. When the Big Me is in the game his defense is almost non existent, unless he’s going for one of those 3 defenders around an easy rebound type of boards, then he’s ruthless. The Big Me loves dictating the offense to the other side of the court, so he’s guaranteed at the most a 2v1, and if he’s too lazy for that he’ll settle for the quick jumper just inside the top of the key. Granted he succeeds on a lot of these plays, but it screams selfishness and lack of team coordination. Then you show me his near 5 assists per game, and say he’s still dishing the ball and including the team right? I say no, if there was a stat that had the ratio of passes per assist Kobe would be 1:1. He passes only when triple teamed and there’s a Laker in the immediate vicinity of the basket. When Kobe isn’t the one bringing the ball down the court, and the Laker holding the rock sheepishly looks the other way, Kobe sits outside the 3-point line with a look that says, “Don’t want to run the offense through me huh? Fine let’s see which one of you bricks this shot.” When the Lakers hit he nonchalantly jogs backwards down the court, when they miss you can smell the shit oozing off that grin. Off the court it’s been reported he avoids all chances of interaction with the team and any sort of chemistry is strictly topical….he doesn’t even shoot around with his teammates before games. Plus the guy wrote a song about how much people love him...I'll provide the link at the end of the article.
The season can not go on like this for Bryant and the Lakers. It’s a time bomb waiting to happen, and it could very well end up ruining Laker basketball for years to come. The Lakers need to make that change soon, and until that happens the Big Me should know and Laker fans should know “Magic Johnson is not walking through that door, fans. Shaq is not walking through that door, and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar is not walking through that door. And if you expect them to walk through that door they’re going to be grey and old.”
"Warning: Do not attempt to listen to this song in an area where others may get the impression you are fruity"
http://www.lyricsdownload.com/kobe-bryant-f--tyra-banks-kobe-lyrics.html
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